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Beneath the mask is the Shadow.
Beneath the veneer of civility lies a world hidden by rules masquerading as morals and upheld by shame. Its visibility varies depending on one’s perspective.
Are you prone to judgment? If so, then trying to understand what people like me see will leave you as bewildered as someone staring intently at a stereogram, hoping to see the three-dimensional shapes concealed within a two-dimensional image. In this context, I’m not referring to a physical picture but rather to our thoughts—how it determines how we judge behavior as either natural or not, depending on where it can be plotted along the spectrum of what’s deemed good and bad.
Because of this, women who see this hidden world need plausible deniability for their safety, while men who can also see it must, for their safety, express themselves with brutal honesty so as to avoid misunderstandings. For those who remain bewildered and stuck in their two-dimensional thinking, they look at others like me as though we are monsters for daring to be awake, like the minotaur of ancient Greek mythology, living authentically within the labyrinth of our nature.
Plausible deniability safeguards the reputation of women against men blinded by their judgmental nature and by their rage at discovering in adulthood that the childhood lies they’ve been told about their worth being determined by looks, money, and status are wrong. The men who see what’s beneath the veneer rely on their charm and the sense of abundance they project to attract women, and because of this, they are never alone, thus adding more to our sense of abundance. In the two-dimensional world of blind men who act clingy, the man who knows how to talk to women—who doesn’t seek to possess them—who doesn’t show his thirst for their attention and knows better than to pedestalize—is considered to be awakened and given everything he seeks while at the same time making himself an enemy to the blind.
It is for this reason that, in this two-dimensional world, the blind will try to control the people by calling women sluts, as if that’s a bad thing, and calling men good providers, as if that’s a good thing. Anything to preserve the dominance of these weak men who’ve been instilled with a morality that has at its foundation simple notions of good and bad, holding on to it as if it were part of who they are so as not to confront the possibility that everything they’ve ever been taught has been wrong, thus preventing their own awakening.
Men like these often try to shame other men who can see beneath the veneer, labeling them as arrogant, egotistical, or toxic, not realizing that these qualities enable the man to awaken to the hidden world and see the three-dimensional objects.
Men who engage in this behavior do so out of frustration, stemming from their inability to be honest about their own desires, thus hindering their ability to express their sexuality in a healthy manner. Based on a lifetime of dealing with men like this, I have noticed that they are often raised by single mothers. It is my belief that because they have been front-line witnesses to their mother’s valiant struggle—doing it all—it becomes difficult for these men to see women as anything other than a Madonna until they meet an awakened woman, whom they then tend to label a whore.
These blind, judgmental men deserve nothing good in life.
I can only laugh at them, especially the young men on social media who endlessly discuss women’s nature and how they believe they need looks, money, and status to attract “dimes.” Meanwhile, awakened men like me routinely deal with beautiful women; some of us have done so while having nothing more than a mattress on the floor of our apartments.
I can't help but laugh at the young women on social media who constantly boast about their looks and beauty, claiming they can have any man they want. But can they keep them? Awakened women, who are sometimes physically average at best, understand that it takes more than looks. They know they have to make a man feel emotional pain. They have to become their addiction; they have to push them away before pulling them back, ultimately getting the man they want to stay—even submit. The keys to the kingdom belong to women like this, who understand that their body means nothing; they must become the “experience” for the man.
The nature of the unawakened man makes him blind to the offerings of the experience. He instead complains about women's nature, not realizing that for the awakened man, it is that nature that makes them beautiful to begin with. The unawakened man who complains that women need to communicate directly should consider dating other men.
For the awakened man and woman—Minotaurs—in the stereogram that is reality, to truly engage with that third dimension while trying to exist in a two-dimensional world, it eventually becomes necessary to establish a consensual power dynamic. This dynamic allows the distinct nature of a man to safely and, with brutal honesty, interact with the distinct nature of a woman. It also allows a woman to safely unburden herself of plausible deniability, and a man to safely unburden himself of his goodness. This goodness, which, before his awakening, would have been shaped out of fear of abandonment by his Devouring Mother, would be there to protect him from judgment that would be quick to call him a creep. Much like a woman's goodness before her awakening would have been shaped out of fear of being called a whore.
No longer burdened, they can safely remove their masks to reveal what is truly real, their shadow selves.
This personal essay reflects the themes at play in my novels and short stories, most notably in my forthcoming collection, The Secret Society, which will soon be available on this platform.
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